TEL AVIV, Israel — Ilana Gritzewsky’s return to Israel came after a harrowing 55-day ordeal as a captive in Gaza. Having been freed in November 2023, the surge of adrenaline left her unable to sleep for two full days after the release.
“You don’t realize it’s truly over,” Gritzewsky reflected on her experience. “You lose track of your identity—it’s as if you forget even your own name.”
With a ceasefire now in place between Israel and Hamas, hostages are being released incrementally. However, the initial joy of being liberated is often followed by a challenging adjustment, as highlighted by former hostages who have shared their stories. Gritzewsky, a 31-year-old originally from Mexico, was taken alongside her boyfriend from Kibbutz Nir Oz on October 7, 2023, during a violent incursion by Hamas militants that claimed around 1,200 lives and resulted in approximately 250 kidnappings, marking the onset of the ongoing conflict in Gaza.
After her release following an earlier ceasefire a year ago, Gritzewsky continues to face multiple health issues. She hasn’t fully regained the weight she lost during her captivity, is prediabetic, and deals with persistent pain from injuries sustained during her kidnapping, including a broken pelvis, jaw, and a burn on her leg from a motorcycle exhaust. Additionally, she has experienced hearing loss in one ear.
“I’m still struggling to care for myself,” she admitted, acknowledging that her focus on fighting for her boyfriend’s release has overshadowed her own recovery journey.
Recently, 15 hostages have been released from Gaza in exchange for a large number of Palestinian prisoners as the ceasefire, which has had a devastating impact on Gaza, continues into its second week. Official reports indicate that over 47,000 Palestinians have died, with extensive destruction across the region. It is anticipated that Hamas will release small groups of hostages weekly during the initial six weeks of the ceasefire, though around 80 hostages are believed to still be in Gaza, with Israel fearing that nearly half of them may already be deceased.
The emotional high of finally being reunited with family members proved palpable for Gritzewsky. She longed for a comforting embrace from her mother and the opportunity to see her family again. Although craving a hearty meal, especially a steak, health concerns due to prolonged nutritional deficiencies delayed her return to normal eating. “Being in captivity changes your mindset about food—you tend to hoard whatever you receive and worry about basic human needs like using the bathroom or sleeping,” she explained.
The days leading to her release were fraught with trauma, as Gritzewsky endured the heartbreak of being told her freedom was imminent multiple times, only to find herself moved to another location. “I was consumed by despair, thinking I would be trapped forever, becoming a mere plaything for the militants,” she said.
As more hostages have been welcomed back into Israel over the past week, Gritzewsky described the experience as a whirlwind of emotions. “It’s finally beginning. Our heroes are emerging, and they are being released on their own feet,” she expressed, although uncertainty lingers regarding the durability of the ceasefire. Her boyfriend, Matan Zangauker, 25, is not among the hostages scheduled for release in this initial phase.
The medical evaluation process for returning hostages involves several days in the hospital, where comprehensive testing helps determine their immediate needs. According to Dr. Ami Banov, an Israeli military physician who has been treating the released captives, although the 15 hostages returned in relatively stable health, they exhibited signs of “mild starvation,” along with various vitamin deficiencies. Many suffered severe injuries during the October 7 attacks, and the medical care they received while captive was often either nonexistent or severely lacking.
Banov noted that some women were held in underground tunnels for periods extending upwards of eight months without access to natural light, potentially leading to substantial vision or skin problems. Captives who shared their ordeal with others tended to have better mental health outcomes than those who were isolated.
Each released hostage is supported by a dedicated team of health professionals, including doctors, nurses, psychologists, and social workers. According to Ofrit Shapira, a psychoanalyst leading a group focused on treating freed hostages and their families, it is crucial to empower the former captives to take charge of their recovery. Every action, from adjusting lighting to scheduling medical examinations, requires the hostages’ approval. “They have had their humanity stripped away, particularly their autonomy, making it essential to help them reclaim that,” she stated.
Doctors refer to this recovery phase as “grounding,” likening it to a decompression period where hostages are systematically guided to understand that they can now make decisions about their lives, ranging from food choices to meeting family. “We see it as our responsibility to allow them the freedom to choose what feels right for them,” Banov added, stressing the careful approach taken in every step of the process.
Another recently freed hostage, Adina Moshe, who spent 49 days in captivity, explained that many returned without knowledge of the devastation to their homes or the fate of their loved ones. They may feel suspicious of people around them and face aggressive media attention. Any signs of improvement in their mental state could easily regress, she cautioned, stating, “Deep down, they will forever remain trapped in those dark tunnels.”
For Avichai Brodutch, the joy of reuniting with his wife and three children, who were taken on the same day as Gritzewsky’s kidnapping, is a moment he will forever cherish. Witnessing his family emerge from the elevator in the hospital was nothing short of miraculous for him. “I got my family back; it felt like they were reborn,” he recalled. The moment was shadowed by the traumatic fear he experienced during their absence, as they returned frail and infested with lice.
Though physical ailments were promptly addressed, Brodutch emphasized the enduring scars left on his family’s mental health. As he hears new accounts of their time in captivity, they continuously relive the horrors of that October day. Brodutch noted that his wife, Hagar, faces the most significant struggles as she wrestles with her memories of caring for their children under such dire circumstances. “The healing of spiritual wounds will be a long, arduous journey,” he concluded.
